I like to compare military raids to mosquitos. Sure, one little bite can be an annoying but you swat it away and move on. If it bites you in the right spot it can be frustrating as hell and you’ll be scratching all night. If you get swarmed by a bunch of mosquitos you just call it quits and go inside because that shit ain’t worth it.
Raids are the same thing just with fewer deaths.
In a nutshell, the purpose of conducting military raids are to harass or demoralize an enemy, destroy certain targets, pillage supplies, assassinate/capture people, or gather intelligence. I’d say the main difference between a raid and a proper battle is that raiders do not attempt to hold ground but instead attack quickly and retreat before the enemy can mount a proper defence.
Raiding has been an integral part of warfare since the beginning of time. Ancient indigenous warriors would stealthily attack enemy camps in the dead of night while medieval knights on horseback would fall upon vulnerable supply lines. Soldiers from both sides in the First World War engaged in large and small-scale raids to capture enemies and modern special forces use it to great effect.
Anyways, by this point you know the drill. I’m about to get into some raids from history that I find interesting and you’re going to sit there quietly and read them. But not too quietly. I encourage you to chuckle softly when appropriate.
Raid on the Royal Navy
Hell yeah, brother! The Royal Navy makes yet another shocking appearance. At this point I’m not even sorry. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: it’s really hard to understate how significant of a role the British and their navy played in world affairs for, like, 250 years.
Anyways, if it makes you feel any better, in this specific chapter of history the Royal Navy is on the rare receiving end of an ass-kicking. And who’s doing the kicking? It ain’t the French, it ain’t the Germans, it ain’t even the Americans. It’s the goddamn Dutch, baby!
So, the Anglo-Dutch Wars were a series of four separate wars that took place between 1652 and 1784. They were fought to determine whether the Dutch or English would control trade routes and certain overseas colonies so, shockingly, the fighting primarily took place at sea.
The raid I’ll be covering took place during the Second Anglo-Dutch War which lasted from 1665-1667. At this point in history the Dutch had the largest merchant navy in the world and the British wanted to knock them down a few pegs because humans are monsters and no one can have nice things.
In January 1665, the conflict escalated from minor skirmishes between a few ships to a full-scale war. The Dutch and English fleets would engage in three large naval battles but none of them resulted in decisive victories for either side. And just to paint you a nice mental image, this is the age of sailing ships with cannons and ropes and stuff.
By the third year of the war the costs were rising quickly and the weary English opened negotiations with the Dutch to end hostilities. It also didn’t help that in 1666 a literal plague was ravaging England so its people weren’t exactly pro-war at the moment.
While the Dutch were also looking to end the fighting they had a dastardly plan to sweeten their end of the deal.
Basically, to save costs the English had split their fleet up in a number ports. Several of these ports were in the River Medway in the south east of England. Their large and powerful ships were docked, most of their equipment and weapons were removed, and they were manned by small crews. However, the river was protected by a number of fortifications as well as a large chain that stretched across a narrow channel to prevent enemy ships from attacking. All in all, the English felt safe and secure.
Oh boy are their faces about to be red.
With their own blood.
On June 6, 1667, a fleet of Dutch raiders sailed into the Thames Estuary. Even though this fleet was spotted, communications were slow and very little was done to organize a proper defence. The Dutch quickly captured the English fort at Sheerness and (rather easily) broke through the aforementioned chain blocking their way.
After that the Dutch forced their way past a couple smaller English ships and obstacles with overwhelming cannon fire before reaching their prize. Four defenceless English battleships lay in front of them. HMS Royal Charles, the flagship of the English fleet, was intact and taken as a prize while the other three had already been scuttled by the English to prevent their capture. The Dutch burned what they could and peaced out while the getting was good.
In the end the Dutch raiders destroyed thirteen ships, captured two, and the English had to scuttle a further thirty. That’s one hell of a butchers bill and this raid is remembered as one of the worst moments in Royal Navy history. The war ended shortly thereafter and the English were forced to concede much more to the Dutch than they anticipated.
But don’t worry, they’d try their best to get revenge five short years later. And then again 106 years after that.
Goddamn people hold grudges.
Taranto before Pearl
I think it’s safe to say that pretty much everyone has heard of the Japanese air raid on Pearl Harbour. That guy in the wheelchair was all “December 7, 1941, a day which will blah blah blah.” It’s one of those moments in history that people just know. Sure, a lot of times their knowledge consists of: “Oh yeah, I remember that movie” But you know what? Still counts.
Some of you might be surprised to learn that back in 1940, over a year before the attack on Pearl Harbour, another air raid occurred that is often overlooked. This raid was so similar and successful that historians theorize that the Japanese were inspired by and studied it for their attack on Hawaii.
Good for them…I guess?
The Italians are the butt of a lot of jokes when it comes to the Second World War. Their army kind of gained a reputation for…getting fucked, to put it mildly. However, in 1939 the Italians had the sixth largest navy in the world. And while some of their ships were old and the crews were inexperienced they were nevertheless a force to be reckoned with. Their fleet was what’s called a “fleet in being” which essentially means they weren’t powerful enough to actually leave the safety of port and win a fight but the very fact that they existed meant that the enemy (in this case, the Royal fucking Navy again) still had to use valuable resources to guard against it.
The Italian “fleet in being” soon became enough of a nuisance and threat to supply lines in the Mediterranean Sea that the British developed a bold plan to take the ships out while they sat in Taranto, the Italian’s primary naval base.
On the night of November 11, 1940, 12 torpedo bombers flew off the deck of the British aircraft carrier HMS Illustrious for the 170 mile flight. Nine more would take off 90 minutes later for a follow-up attack. This would be the first time in history that carrier-based airplanes would attack an enemy surface naval force.
While the Italians had plenty of anti-aircraft guns and anti-torpedo nets protecting their ships they were caught by surprise and British raid was an overwhelming success. For only two planes shot down, three Italian battleships suffered significant damage along with one heavy cruiser and two destroyers. In effect, half of their navy was put out of commission in the span of a couple hours and it would never fully recover.
This raid was all the more impressive considering that the aircraft the British were flying were supposed to be obsolete before the war even started. Seriously, they were some Wright Brothers-looking shit.
That sorry looking antique is the Fairey Swordfish. Half of it was made of canvas, its top speed was about about 140 mph (you could outrun this thing in your Jetta), and its pilots had to communicate with hand signals because the fucking things didn’t even have radios. Regardless, it was the only carrier-based plane the Brits had at the time and gosh darnit they got the job done!
The Swordfish was truly the Rudy of the Second World War.
And if you don’t get that reference then fuck you.
More explosives, damnit!
Okay, yes, I’m about to do another one from the Second World War. Deal with it. This period saw a lot of intense shit happen, alright?
And yes it’s also another one that has to do with blowing up naval assets. I’m sorry if this seems repetitive but a lot of raids were used for this purpose. You know why? Because history shows it works, damnit!
I promise the last raid in this post won’t mention boats or ships or anything to do with water.
Pinky swear.
During the Second World War, naval ports in western France became very important for German surface vessels and submarines. These ports gave them easier access to the Atlantic by allowing them to bypass the North Sea where the bulk of the Royal Navy was stationed.
In early 1942 the Brits became very worried about the newly operational German battleship Tirpitz. Tirpitz was very well-armed, armoured, and fast, and if she got loose in the Atlantic she had the potential cause serious problems for Allied merchant shipping. The good news? The port at St.Nazaire was the only place in western France with a large enough dry-dock to accommodate the German battleship. If the dock was put out of commission then Tirpitz would have to take a longer and more dangerous route back to Germany or Norway if she needed repairs.
Following me so far?
All you need to know is that the Brits decided a good ol’ fashioned raid was needed to deny the Germans the use of the dry-dock at St.Nazaire.
In order to accomplish this task the Brits gathered over 600 insanely bad-ass commandos and loaded a shit-ton of explosives (in a super-secret compartment) onto an old destroyer, HMS Campbeltown. The plan? The commandos amphibiously assault the port to blow up as much expensive looking stuff as possible while the destroyer is intentionally rammed at full-speed into the dry-dock. Once that’s all done everyone hops back on their landing craft and heads for home.
Easy-peasy.
Now, I won’t sugar-coat it. It was a bold plan and sometimes bold plans go to hell. The commandos wreaked havoc but the German defences of the port were strong and only 228 of the 612 men made it back to Britain. 169 were killed and the rest were captured.
On the bright-side, Campbeltown performed her job perfectly and rammed the dock right on target.
The explosives hidden in her hull were set to detonate on an eight to ten hour delayed fuse because no one can accuse the Brits of not having a dark sense of humour. The massive explosion killed 360 Germans who were examining Campbeltown after the raid and rendered the dry-dock unusable for the remainder of the war. In fact, the French didn’t get the damn thing operational again until 1950.
Operation Thunderbolt
So it’s 1944 and the Royal Navy has to blow up these ships, right?
Ha! Just kidding, look at your stupid face.
I’m sorry, please don’t leave. This next raid is actually really cool!
The late 1960’s and into the 1970’s was the golden age of airplane hijackings. Seriously, during this period there was a global average of one hijacking every five fucking days. This was before any serious security measures were in place at airports (thanks a lot 9/11) and planes were an easy target. Hijackings ranged from individuals doing it for ransom money all the way up to politically motivated groups looking to draw attention to their cause.
With that we come to June 27, 1976. Four hijackers, two Palestinians from the Popular Front for the Liberation of Palestine and two Germans from the Revolutionary Cells, seized control of an Air France flight after it left Athens. The plane held 258 passengers, mostly from Israel, and twelve crew members. The flight was bound for Paris but the hijackers forced the pilots to divert course they eventually ended up in Entebbe, Uganda.
Ugandan President Idi Amin (he probably makes a top ten list of brutal dictators) played both sides during the crisis. He swayed back and forth between supporting the hijackers and telling the Israelis that he was trying to end things peacefully. The hostages were held in a disused building at the Entebbe airport and Amin came to visit them several times during the crisis.
Over a couple days, the hijackers released 148 passengers and only kept those who were of Israeli or Jewish heritage as well as the Air France crew. They wanted the release of forty imprisoned Palestinians in Israel as well as thirteen more who were being held in other countries in exchange for the hostages.
Now, I’m not about to dive into the history of Israeli-Palestinian relations because I’m nowhere near qualified for something like that. You can do your own research and reach your own conclusion. For the purposes of this post you just need to know that the Israelis weren’t in the mood to just sit around so they developed a ballsy goddamn plan to get their people back.
On the night of July 4, with only about a week of planning, three Israeli transport aircraft loaded with Israeli Defence Force (IDF) commandos and vehicles flew the 4000 kilometres to Entebbe (with a refuel in Kenya) and straight-up landed at the airport where the hostages were being held. The Israelis brought along a black Mercedes and a couple Land Rovers that looked similar to the ones President Amin drove around with. I guess they hoped to just be waved through any security gates?
Instead the Israelis opened fire on the airport guards, which wasn’t part of the plan, killing two of them. Regardless, surprise was still on their side and after a fire-fight all of the hijackers were killed along with forty-five Ugandan soldiers. Three hostages were killed and ten were wounded in the crossfire. One Israeli soldier was also killed and five more were wounded. The Israelis then proceeded to blow up eleven Ugandan MiG fighter jets that were parked at the airport (cause fuck em’) before loading back into their aircraft and flying off into the night. The entire raid took less than an hour.
Needless to say, Amin was fucking pissed and very nearly started an entire war over the raid. I’m sure he was even less impressed when five goddamn movies about the Israeli raid were later released which didn’t exactly portray him in the kindest light.
Just kidding, that fucker died in 2003.
Based in the basement 